How I Balance Work and Motherhood as a Full-Time Pediatrician and Mom

There are days when I leave for work before my baby wakes up and return just before bedtime. And just as I walk in the door to pick up my crying baby, who just needs me, I hear my pager start beeping. I am pulled into managing an urgent patient consult instead of being able to hold my baby.

In those moments, I think: “I wish I could do more on some days.”

I wish I could be fully present, without competing priorities. I wish I could let go of the mental load that comes with balancing my full-time job as a pediatrician and a mom. I just wish I could do more on some days. But the reality is – on most days, what I want to do and what I can realistically do just don’t align.

And I know I'm not alone.

Why the ideal parenting plan doesn’t always fit real life

Parents today are flooded with information on how to raise healthy, happy children. Backed by volumes of research on child development, pediatricians, speech therapists, developmental and feeding experts all recommend:

• Responsive feeding

• Predictable, consistent routines

• Slow and supported transitions

• Home-cooked, nutrient-rich meals

• Minimal screen time

• Sensory-rich and developmentally appropriate activities

But real life? It doesn't always follow the guidelines.

For most of us, the demands of work, parenting, and just making it through the day mean there’s a gap between what we know is ideal and what’s realistic.

So I am here to share (and normalize) that even as a pediatrician, I, too, don't always meet the "ideal". And that’s okay.

Letting go of perfection: finding peace in the messy middle

What the ‘messy middle’ of motherhood actually looks like

Getting comfortable in the "messy middle", that space between perfection and reality, wasn't natural for me. I used to stress over following every feeding recommendation, introducing allergens at the exact right time, sticking to the ideal routine.

But the truth? That pressure left me feeling disconnected from my baby. Burned out.

I realized that I was missing the point, my baby didn't need me to be perfect or follow rigid guidelines, he just needed me.

Is it okay if you don’t follow every feeding rule? (yes.)

I had to let go of the self-imposed pressure that if I wasn't following the current guidelines perfectly, I was somehow failing my baby. I allowed myself to do so without guilt.

What babies really need isn’t perfect meals, it’s you

Kids don't need perfection, they need presence. They need nourishment instead of a rigid plan.

- Some weeks I meal prep veggie muffins. But other times? I buy a rotisserie chicken.
- Sometimes it’s homemade sweet potato turkey meatballs and lentils, some other days it's puffs and strawberries on repeat.
- Sometimes "responsive feeding" means handing my toddler a banana and milk while I take a work call.

But through all every moment, I know my baby is safe, loved, and nourished.

At Bébé Foodie, we believe in real-life parenting over perfection

We support you where you are instead of where you think you should be

We believe in:

• Supporting parents with flexible, judgment-free tools

• Removing shame from feeding and nutrition choices

• Helping you feel confident even when life feels chaotic

• Celebrating the real wins, not just the camera-ready ones

Even when it’s not picture-perfect, you’re still doing great

If today didn’t go according to the parenting book? That’s okay.
If dinner was skipped or refused (again)? That’s okay.
If you’re figuring this out day by day? You’re doing better than you think.

Feeding shortcuts that nourish just as well (no guilt needed)

So yes, you're allowed (and encouraged) to:

• Use pouches or frozen vegetables without guilt

• Delay a transition (to a crib, to solids, to whole milk) because you're not ready

• Repeat meals all week because you just can't think about meal planning

• Spoon-feed because you need to get that meal in a rush

6 simple, guilt-free tips for feeding and thriving as a working parent

Are you feeling overwhelmed by the pressure to be the perfect parent?  Are you learning how to parent in the "messy middle"?  Here are a few tips that have helped me to simplify and let go:

1. Look ahead at your week before making feeding changes

Look ahead realistically. If your week is packed with meetings, deadlines, travel, or life chaos, it’s probably not the best time to introduce new allergens or drop a nap. Wait until a calmer week.

2. Pick one meal each day to slow down and connect

Building a positive relationship with food from day one doesn't mean every meal has to be perfect. Choose one meal (like breakfast or weekend brunch) where you can offer variety, sit together, or try something new. Let the rest of the meals be simple.

3. Yes, it’s okay to repeat meals (really)

Kids thrive off a routine! Pancakes five days in a row? Totally fine. Repeating meals can reduce your mealtime decision fatigue. And the predictability you are creating gives your child a sense of comfort and confidence around food and with mealtimes.

4. Use the shortcuts that make life easier for you

Frozen veggies? Instant oatmeal? Rotisserie chicken? Yes, yes, and yes. You don't need to always cook from scratch to nourish your child well. Do what works for you – without guilt.

5. Transitions can wait until you’re ready, and that’s valid

Just because your baby has reached the “right” age milestone for specific transitions doesn't mean you have to make the change that day. Moving to a crib, dropping the pacifier, or starting solids can all wait until you feel ready. Trust your gut,  only you know what timing will work best for your family.

6. Choose the moments that matter most to you

You don't have to "do it all". Maybe it’s reading a bedtime story or morning cuddles before daycare. Pick the rituals that matter most and let the rest be flexible.

To the working mom who’s wondering if she’s doing enough

Yes, you can love your job and still be a great mom

I know what it's like to carry the pressure of being an "expert" and still wonder if I'm doing any of it "right." I know the weight of wanting to be two places at once. I know the guilt of taking shortcuts and the joy of small wins – like a toddler trying a new vegetable or a meal without thrown food.

And I'm a working mom who has had a toddler refuse (and then throw) dinner with a pager beeping in the background.

The goal isn’t perfection, it’s showing up with love

So if no one has told you today:
You’re doing a great job.
You don’t have to be perfect.
You just have to keep showing up, with love.

The goal isn't perfect meals or perfect routines or perfect parenting.
The goal is connection, nourishment, adaptability, and showing up with love.

Whatever that looks like for you today.

Written by Dr. Irini Kolaitis, MD

Pediatrician & Advisor at Bébé Foodie

Dr. Irini Kolaitis is a board-certified pediatric hospitalist in Chicago, with dual certification in General Pediatrics and Pediatric Hospital Medicine. With clinical expertise in food-related issues like anaphylaxis, feeding challenges, and nutritional deficiencies, she brings both professional and personal insight to Bébé Foodie. As a new mom, Dr. Kolaitis understands the ups and downs of introducing solids and supports our mission to make nutrition guidance simple and pressure-free for families.

This blog post is for information purposes only and shouldn’t be used as personal, health, nutritional, or medical advice. Always consult with your pediatrician before making any decisions about your child's health or readiness for various foods.